Death by Cake Mix
by SuicidalToeSocks
Summary: That's as good as any mixer! Blending and mixing are the same things anyways, right?" he said, rushing the bowl of what would soon be vanilla frosting to the blender. Of all the things he may be, Jimmy is not a baker, no matter how hard he tries.


**By request, another Questshippig fic! Or... something like that. I can never get all the ships straight. I found a website with a ton of ships on them, including some of the most obscure shippings, and in MS Word, it's 83 pages. I'm not about to go through all of them trying to find just one. **

**Disclaimer: Ownage of Nothing. Boo.**

Jimmy was not a cheesy person.

He was down-to-earth and competitive.

Smart and talented.

Arrogant, yet determined.

But of all his traits, he _was not_ cheesy.

His Typhlosion looked at him with a raised eyebrow and grinned in the most taunting way a pokemon ever could Jimmy glared at him through slitted eyes.

"It is not! Shut up!" he said, turning around to hide the paper from his pokemon. He wrapped his arm around the pad of paper he was holding, as if it could shield all prying eyes from the paper. Wishful thinking on his part, really.

"Now, what rhymes with smart?" he asked his pokemon. Although he couldn't voice his opinion, Typhlosion could think of a few good ones.

_Fart, tart, Bart..._

"Shopping cart!" Jimmy said, perking up in an instant. "Of course!"

Typhosion put a paw to its' forehead and shook his head. His master was so lovestruck he didn't know how stupid he actually sounded!

"Orange... orange..." Jimmy muttered under his breath. Typhlosion growled. There was nothing that rhymed with the word orange!

"She'll be so excited when she reads this!" Jimmy crowed, standing abruptly and pocketing the piece of paper. Typhlosion stood too, trying to get a quick peek at the paper before his master put it away. He had no such luck.

"But... what if it isn't enough?" he asked suddenly, whipping around to face his companion, all traces of success and triumph wiped clean of his expression. Typhlosion rolled his eyes.

"I'll do something for her!" he smacked a fist down into his palm. "Girls love chocolate, right?" Typhlosion nodded.

_Brownies are delicious!_

"And what better way to give them chocolate than to make _chocolate cake!_" he crowed. Typhlosion performed the best anime fall Jimmy had seen him do in years and watched as the pokemon twitched.

"Come on, get up! I can cook if I want to! Just you see!" he said, fists resting on his hips. "And the best part f it is, you're going to help me!"

Typhlosion groaned. This day was not going the way he wanted.

Xxxx

"Okay. Eggs, flour, sugar, yeast..." Jimmy stood at the counter of the kitchen in the back of the pokemon center. He was allowed to borrow the place for the day, they said. Typhlosion guessed they would be needing it longer than that.

Jimmy was wearing the only apron available to him. A pink and frilly creature, it tied around the back and the ruffles were so ferocious that they had to be continuously pushed out of the way while cooking. Typhlosion was dressed in an apron as well, though his was blue with a very small ruffle around the edges, which still bothered him. His though, came bearing the phrase _KISS THE COOK_ in large letters on the front.

"We've got everything!" Jimmy said proudly at is own handiwork. Now all we have to do is add them all together and make the cake! That isn't so bad!"

_There are to many things that could go wrong here._ Typhlosion thought. Still, he stood and watched as Jimmy read the recipe carefully.

"Cream the butter and sugar... beat in eggs as well." Jimmy read off, then stopped. "What, it wants me to beat them up? How on earth am I supposed to cream them?" he asked to the silence. When nobody answered, he shrugged.

Oh well. In they go!" he said, dumping the butter and sugar into a bowl. "Now, about those eggs..." he picked one up and turned it around in his hands. "Cracking an egg is simple enough!" he grinned. "All you have to do is-" he his the egg on the counter. The egg broke open, spilling all of its' contents out over the counter.

"Uhm..." Jimmy looked at the broken egg shell and the mess of sticky, goopy egg brains and frowned. "Guess I was a little too excited..." Typhlosion rolled his eyes.

"No worries! I still have one more!" he ginned, not to be deterred, and picked up the other egg. This time, he tapped it cautiously on the counter until the tiniest of cracks appeared. He then held it over the bowl and held it, not sure of what to do next.

Typhlosion nudged him with his nose and pointed to the egg. Jimmy gulped and pressed his thumbs into the crack to open the egg.

_CRACK_

The egg was punched open and the gooey mess of slimy egg dropped into the bowl as well as Jimmy's arm, a few egg shells jumping with them to join their cake party.

"Ewww..." Jimmy's nose wrinkled in disgust. "It's all gooey..."

_Way to be a man, Jimmy._ Typhlosion thought. Jimmy went back to the recipe.

"Add the flour and dissolve the cocoa in the boiling water." he read off. "Alright, boiling water... And two cups." he muttered to himself, turning around and searching the pantry shelves behind him. He pulled out three cups, and filled one with hot water.

"Here, dump the cocoa into this, Typhlosion." Jimmy said. Typhlosion nodded as Kimmy struggled to get the flour sack open.

"Sure is a tough little bugger, isn't it?" he grunted, giving one last ferocious tug.

The bag ripped open and the air was filled with white, powdery dust. Covering everything it touched in a white film.

"Ahhh... Ahhh..." Jimmy breathed. "AHHH-CHOO!" White powder rocketed off the counter-top into Typhlosion. Typhlosion sniffed. And his nose twitched.

Jimmy backed up with wide eyes, coming to rest against the opposite wall.

"No! Don't sneeze! Please!" he begged. Typhlosion couldn't have stopped if he had tried. With one last mighty breath, he sneezed, a torrent of flames erupting from his nostrils and his back.

"OW! OW!" Jimmy hopped up and down on one foot, clutching the other in his hands while Typhlosion grinned rather sheepishly. A pair of towels behind him had caught fire, but were somewhat distinguished by the new layer of white powder in the air.

"Stupid flour!" Jimmy muttered, kicking the half-empty bag on the floor and causing himself to start hopping around again, a new pain springing back to the foot.

"Two cups my-"

"Is everything all right in there? I thought I heard shouting!" Nurse Joy called from behind the door. Jimmy and his pokemon locked eyes and shot towards the door, reaching it just before Nurse Joy pushed it open.

"Nothing! Nothing, we're fine! Everything is swell!" Jimmy called through the door, he and Typhlosion pushing on it with all their might.

"Are you sure you don't need my help?" called the Nurse through the door.

"No! No, we're fine! Typhlosion just sneezed is all! Peachy keen!" called Jimmy, his voice rushed and cracking.

"Alright. You boys take care in there." she said. Only after they heard her retreating footsteps did they slump against the door and relax.

"That was close." Jimmy breathed, eyeing the gigantic scorch mark on the tile floor of the kitchen. "We could have been discovered!"

They set back to work, adding the two cups of flour into the mixture and the cocoa in hot water. Jimmy grabbed a wooden spoon and started stirring, combining the ingredients into one giant mass of lump. Jimmy stick a finger in it, and almost immediately pulled it out of his mouth, his face contorted in a mixture of disgust and that I'm-gonna-be-sick look.

"Needs more sugar." he decided, dashing over to the other counter and hauling the bag back over with him. He pulled out one of the pink cups he had used on the flour.

"Just a bit more..." he said, filling the cup to the top and dumping it in. Then, he had a spark of inspiration.

"Hey, what is it when bakers and cooks add in little bits of obscure things to their food to make it taste better?" he asked. Typhlosion shrugged.

"Oh yeah! Improvising!" Jimmy snapped his fingers and rushing to the pantry. "Now, let's see..."

He pulled out bottles of seasonings one by one, and carefully tasted each one of them, picking only the best of flavors for his cake batter.

"She'll love this cake!" he was saying to Typhlosion as he mixed in the spices and seasonings. "A home-made chocolate cake! Why didn't I think of this before?"

Typhlosion shrugged as he watched Jimmy work harder and harder to stir the batter in the bowl.

"Is it supposed to be this sticky?" he asked, trying to pull out the spoon. Instead, the lump of batter latched on and came up with it. Jimmy looked at it with interest. "How on earth do they get the batter in the pan then?" he asked to nobody in particular. "Bakers are like miracle workers!"

He set the spoon back into the bowl and the bowl back on the counter and went to turn on the oven. Typhosion watched the spoon for a moment, then realized the spoon was getting smaller and smaller.

The spoon was being eaten by the batter!

Quickly, he ran over and grabbed the spoon, roaring at Jimmy to turn around and help, dangit! By the time he did look, though, the spoon was only a mere memory in the lives of Jimmy and Typhlosion, and all those who had come to know the spoon before.

"Well Typhlosion," Jimmy said, staring at the bowl. "We've just created a creature that eats kitchen utensils for a source of energy." he said. Typhlosion nodded wisely.

"You watch it carefully while I get the baking pan." he said. Typhlosion nodded again, ready to spit flames at a moment's notice.

He never got his chance though, before Jimmy returned. Though, he could have sworn that he had seen the batter twitch a few moments ago...

"Alright, we're going to bake this thing." Jimmy said, his eyebrows focused on one centerpoint on his forehead, his face set with determination. Assuming one could get to it through all the flour, sweat, and various other cooking ingredients covering it.

Jimmy tipped the bowl carefully and Typhlosion held the pan, still ready to attack if need be.

Jimmy tilted the bowl a little further, and further still, until it was completely upside-down. The batter was immobile, stuck to the bottom of the bowl and not budging.

"Err..." Jimmy put the bowl back straight and chanced a poke at it with the new fork in his hand to replace the recently-deceased wooden spoon.

There was a _THHHHUCK!_ and the fork was sucked out of Jimmy's hand and into the hard lump of Doom Cake Batter. Jimmy took a step back with Typhlosion.

"I think we'd better bake it in that bowl... don't you?" Jimmy suggested. Typhlosion nodded and reaching out carefully, for fear it might attack him, Jimmy picked up the bowl and quickly ran it over to the oven, nearly skidding on a patch of butter on the floor on his way. Once safely in the oven, he relaxed and sank to the floor.

"Baking is harder than I thought..." he sighed, wiping his forehead with his arm. "I'm sweltering!" he said finally, taking off his jacket and flinging it to an obscure corner of the room. Typhlosion agreed, and slumped over on the floor, not caring that he was not coated in cake ingredients and even some that should only belong in certain products of Mexican food.

"Wait... We're not done yet!" Jimmy groaned, putting his head in his hands. "We're making a cake... we have to make frosting too!"

Typhlosion opened one eye and looked at him, his gaze clearly portraying the thought _'Go out and BUY some then!'_

"No!" Jimmy stood up, placing his fist in his hand once more. "This is for Marina! She deserves effort on our part!"

_On OUR part?_ Typhlosion thought, but let out a groan and pushed himself back to a standing position.

"Only, this time, we'll do simple vanilla frosting, okay?" Jimmy suggested, flipping to another page in the cookbook. Typhlosion sighed in relief. Something _simple_.

"See? Easy! Just put all the stuff into a bowl and mix! Simple enough!" Jimmy said, pulling out a bowl and mixing together powdered sugar, maple syrup, butter, and an egg. (And somehow, he managed to get the egg open all by himself! He was so proud.)

"And now, we mix!" he said, pulling open the cutlery drawer in search of a spoon.

Except, there was no spoon.

"Typhlosion... there's no spoon!" Jimmy gasped, digging frantically through the drawer in case he missed one. "No spoon! And no mixer! How are we going to make frosting without a spoon?!"

"Raaa!" Typhlosion said, tugging Jimmy's sleeve. He turned and saw Typhlosion pointing at the blender with a smile on his face. Jimmy's eyes lit up.

"Yeah! That's as good as any mixer! Blending and mixing are the same things anyways, right?" he said, rushing the bowl of what would soon be vanilla frosting to the blender.

"And we dump it all in here and press this button there..." Jimmy said with a grin on his face.

The blender started. Slow, at first, but progressively got faster. By the time Jimmy realized his mistake, it was too late.

He left the lid off the blender.

"Stop the blender stop the blender!" he shouted to Typhlosion, trying to make his way through the flying mess of frosting towards the blender. "It's out of control!"

_Cooking this thing is going to be the death of me..._ Typhlosion thought as Jimmy finally reached the blender and turned it off.

"Jimmy! What on earth is going on around here?"

Jimmy and Typhlosion whipped their heads around, causing a shower of frosting and other assorted baking ingredients to fly through the air and land on Marina, who had just walked through the door o the kitchen. She froze in her tracks, the door swinging shut behind her.

"Well, if you even _are_ Jimmy under all that stuff..." she took a step towards him and dragged a finger across his cheek. Jimmy stood stock-still, staring at Marina in uncomfortable fear, trying desperately to hide the 'cake' in the oven without moving. It wasn't going well.

"Well well, it is!" Marina clapped her hands together. "I can see you! Jimmy, it's me!" she squealed, wrapping her arms around his middle and hugging him tight.

"Er... Hi, Marina..." he said, patting the top of her head awkwardly. She grinned into his frilly apron.

"I haven't seen you in so long!" she said, looking up at him. "Though, now that I have... You remind me of some sort of kitchen explosion... What were you making anyways?"

"Er, cake. For someone." Jimmy answered quickly. She raised an eyebrow but said nothing more.

"So how did you making a cake turn into exploding the kitchen? If we stuck you in the oven right now you'd make a lovely cake yourself, seeing as how you're covered with enough of the ingredients."

Jimmy flushed bright red. Dirty thoughts flashed through his mind at the comment, but he said nothing. It was a good thing he was covered in such a mess of cake ingredients too, otherwise she would have seen the crimson in his face.

"Jeez! Jimmy, you don't bake a cake in a bowl!" she cried, over at the stove. He rubbed the back of his neck and chuckled nervously.

"Yeah, well, it's kind of like cement in there..." he said when she set it down on the counter after removing it from the oven. She put a fist on her hip and stared at him in an extremely unimpressed way.

"Yeah, and it eats things too! A fork and a spoon! And don't try poking it!" he said, rushing to pull her hand away from the bowl, as she was about to push her finger into the intelligent mixture formerly known as 'cake batter.'

"Jimmy!" she cried as he slid on that evil patch of butter on the floor, losing his balance and skidding into Marina, who lost her balance. The two toppled to the floor, Jimmy just barely catching himself with his one hand, his other still clamped tightly around Marina's. A jolt was sent through his arm and he screwed his eyes shut in pain and gritted his teeth.

_Damn gravity..._ he thought. _It never seems to work in my favor..._

"Uhm, Jimmy?" Marina said quietly, causing Jimmy's internal rant to end. He opened his eyes quickly, and found he was staring back at Marina, who was blushing slightly at their closeness. He was propped up atop her by his hand and knees, which had caught his fall. The hand still holding hers was pressed tightly against his chest. Her hand was still the same, her pointer finger out and ready to dip into the batter. Jimmy's face flushed when he realized their predicament.

"Sorry Marina!" he said quickly, avoiding eye contact and pushing himself to his feet immediately. He held out his hand to her, still not looking her direction. She looked at his hand for a moment, then back at him, then accepted his offer and he pulled her to her feet.

"So," Marina cleared her throat, trying her best to ignore the taunting snickers from Jimmy's Typhlosion behind her. "If you're going to make a cake, you'd better let me help you."

"For the next half hour, Jimmy watched Marina in awe, wondering how on earth she could make a cake batter that didn't turn to concrete, how she could manage to pull the spoon from the batter without it being eaten, and most importantly: How could she crack that egg so nicely?

When all was said and done, Marina stood back with Jimmy and Typhlosion, all three standing in front of the oven, admiring the cake placed inside it.

"Now, we clean up." she said matter-of-fact-ly. "Jimmy, you start by cleaning yourself first, otherwise we'll only have to clean again when you touch something. And take off that apron!" she giggled. Jimmy looked down and realized the pink and frilly apron he had been wearing the entire time, and quickly pulled it off over his head.

"I'll get started on the countertops over here, and Typhlosion, you start with the floor. Don't forget to scrub that butter splotch good and clean!" she sang as she set the two to work./ Once Jimmy was clean, he was set to scrubbing the walls clean of his blender disaster and before he knew it, the oven timer had buzzed.

"The cake!" Jimmy and Marina both said together, heading towards the oven. Jimmy pulled open the door while Marina pulled the cake out, setting it down on the counter next to a bowl of white stuff.

"What's that?" he asked, pointing to the small bowl. Marina laughed.

"Frosting! You can't expect a cake to just be that way, can you? All cakes need frosting!"

"Yeah, but when did you make it? We've been cleaning since we put the cake in!"

"It isn't my fault you didn't turn around." she winked, turning the cake pan upside-down over a plate and it fell perfectly down, as a perfect little cake should. She pulled out a butter knife and began frosting the cake with smooth, even strokes, until it was completely covered in white frosting. She grinned and stood back from her handiwork. "See? Nothing to it!"

"Well, if you made the cake, then I get to put the sprinkles on." Jimmy said, rushing to the cabinet for a bottle of sprinkles.

"Ahh!" he shouted, falling forward and landing on his face. He looked back and saw his Typhlosion, laying on the floor, sound asleep. He grinned.

"Typhlosion, return." he said, pulling out a pokeball and pointing it at his pokemon. Marina had suppressed a giggle at his fall, and Jimmy had glared at her, though strictly to give her a hard time. She giggled again, and he retrieved the sprinkles and came back, standing nervously in front of the cake. It was so pretty,it was almost cruel to take away from that with rainbow sprinkles...

"Go on!" Marina said, putting a hand on his shoulder. His insides froze, but he tipped the sprinkles over and-

The top fell off and sprinkles fell everywhere, the entire contents of the bottle dispensed on the cake, burying it in a shower of rainbow. Jimmy hung his head.

"I suck at baking." he said. Marina had been silent for a moment, then began laughing.

"Go on, laugh." Jimmy said. "I deserve it."

"No, I'm not laughing at you!" Marina said. "The cake! It looks prettier that way." she said. Jimmy looked. A mountain of rainbow sprinkles on top of a flawless cake.

His own mess of sprinkles on top of Marina's cake.

"I ruined your perfect cake!" he said. "How can you like that?"

"What's this?" Marina asked after a long pause, snatching the piece of paper that was sticking out of Jimmy's pocket in an attempt to change the subject. Jimmy made a dive for it, but Marina held it up out of the way of his flying hands.

"Marina, no! You're not supposed to see that!" he said, frantically trying to snatch the paper back from her, but failing miserably. Marina looked up from the paper with shining eyes after reading.

"Jimmy, you wrote this for me?" she asked. "It's one of the nicest poems I've ever read! But it's rather cheesy...

"It is not!" Jimmy defended. Marina pointed to a line on the page

"You rhymed Orange with door hinge." she said. Jimmy puffed out his chest.

"Rather clever, I thought!" he said. Marina laughed.

"And so, if you wrote this for me, and then told me you were making a cake for someone, I'm assuming that was for me too?" she asked, pointing to the mountain of rainbow on the cake. Jimmy turned almost seven different shades of red before nodding. Marina grinned.

"Oh, Jimmy! You're so cute!" she said, tossing her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly. He grinned through his blush and hugged her back, loving the feeling of warmth her body made on his.

Lost in thought, Jimmy didn't realize until she had acted. Marina had tilted her head up to meet his and in a second, her lips rested on his softly in a gentle, yet wonderful kiss.

Jimmy's eyes grew wide as saucers before slowly forgetting his initial shock and closing them, easing into the kiss in a way one would testing the water at a pool or lake for temperature. His hand came up and rested itself on the side of her face while the other rested on her waist.

After what seemed like an eternity to the two, they broke apart and stared at each other, silent.

Finally, Jimmy smiled gentley.

"No, see, if anything was cheesy, it was what you did right there." he teased. Marina pushed him playfully.

"You started it." she giggled.

**A/N: Well, there you go. 2nd questshipping fic. Hope you enjoy it! **

**Jimmy baking... I can't see it at all, even after all this. Still, I think I'll be drawign something about this to post on my deviantart account. You may see it sometime, and you may not. **

**(Did I mention I love art from my stories? If you draw something, I'll box up a cookie and send it to you. And I'm not even joking.) **

**Orange/Door Hinge rhyme credit to one of my friend's friends. Think about it and say it out loud a few times... It really does sorta rhyme!**

**Go review now. **


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